Photo courtesy of Wikipedia.

By Nicholas Jason Lopez

It’s that time of the year when WWE thanks the military the best way possible – feel-good holiday filler television.

Given what horrors these courageous troops regularly face, this was probably relieving.

Based on that alone, we can’t be too critical of the show, but it definitely entertained.

(Aired 12/23/15)

The Breakdown

– The opening video chronicled the courageous services of those fighting for our freedom in America every day and WWE saying “thank you.” Surprised it was in Jacksonville, Florida this time.

– Oh look, it’s WWE World Heavyweight Champion Roman Reigns starting off the show and he’s got his family (WWE Intercontinental Champion Dean Ambrose and Slammy-Award Winning Usos) with him. Watch out. Of course Reigns appreciating the “family” moment didn’t last long because the League Of Nations interrupted him and clamored over their own countries being superior to US. Barrett talked about American food being greasy compared to United Kingdom’s shiny teeth and food. WWE United States Champion Alberto Del Rio called American TV terrible compared to Mexican TV. Sheamus talked about Ireland having better food, corned beef and the best gingers. Reigns said tater tots. Dear god. Make it stop. They all met in the ring when The Wyatt Family sounder went off and they came out, followed by The Dudley Boyz/Ryback/Kane. Didn’t this happen on Raw already? A chaotic brawl broke out wouldn’t cha know.

– The Rusev-Jack Swagger “Boot Camp” match saw elements of the classic angry Lana Bulgarian promo. Usual filler action involving militaristic props that ended with Swagger making Rusev tap out to the Patriot Lock. It wouldn’t make sense to have a pro-America show without having American stars win the matches.

– The Mark Henry-Bo Dallas match saw Dallas come out in an Uncle Sam outfit and slap away Henry when he tried to touch him, which only made him angry and suffer a World’s Strongest Slam before Henry took his Uncle Sam hat. Right. Holiday filler.

– The Ryback-Kevin Owens match started with a decent “get the crowd angry” Owens promo that talked about paying tribute to Canada before translating to subtle condescending French dialogue. The action didn’t last long enough before Owens purposely retreated after getting knocked out of the ring to lose by countout.

– The Eight-Diva tag match between WWE Divas Champion Charlotte/Becky Lynch/Brie Bella/Alicia Fox and Team BAD/Paige was your general Diva filler with fake alliances and piped-in heat and cheers. Banks won with the Bank Statement.

– The 16-Man Tag main event was a perfect metaphor for the show as a whole – feel-good holiday filler. Entertaining with many outside suicide dive spots and quick-paced finisher exchanges, but we knew this result going in. The good guys would never lose this. Ever.

Results

• Boot Camp Match – Jack Swagger def. Rusev (w/Lana) via submission
• Mark Henry def. Bo Dallas via pinfall
• Ryback def. Kevin Owens via pinfall
• Eight-Diva Tag – Team BAD/Paige def. Charlotte/Becky Lynch/Brie Bella/Alicia Fox via submission 
• 16-Man Tag – Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose/The Usos/The Dudley Boyz/Kane/Ryback def. The Wyatt Family/The League Of Nations via pinfall